dosent it hurt so much more , knowing what could of been but never became ?

im tired . how horrible . had the best maths lesson out . ahaha . (L) ANDY ! . had to run home with 12 cruisers from chester hill station . fmd . anthony you owe me . nothing will / can ruin tommorow .the main thing ive been focusing on lately is blogging . nothing much seems as important , not that yearlies dosent mean anything to me , its just I cant go to sleep at night properly without a proper blogging sesh , sad ? I know . I have discovered that somebody has used a image of me without my consent , I understand that some people would like to use images of me to attract and advertise for there etc etc etc , but puh-lease could you use a appropriate photo of me ? I mean , sharon gets a perfectly nice photo where as I , I have a orange in my mouth . a orange . I just realise my dad never opened the fathers day present that I got him this year . fah , I searched far and wide for those socks and all you do is chuck the whole thing near the noodle box in the kitchen , some father you are . mummy made speghetti with mushrooms , is that right ? it dosent seem right , but tastes nice . I saw jodie & bella today , you girlies are so beautiful & anthony agrees . anthony you owe me . I don’t like the way I’ve been feeling lately , im all happy then not so happy , ive been smiling for no reason, just smiling cause I want everyone to think im fine , that im happy, when really all I want to do is not feel at all ,to be immune against the things that hurt, but I force a smile .sometimes im even happy, truly , I can laugh & for the spilt second I would have forgotton about you . but it dosent last long , everything reminds me of you – you did something to me . you took something . id like it back . but we both know , that’s never going to happen . I need to stop relying on false impressions as something more , when it could be much less . maybe if I do a jenny , I wouldn’t hurt at all.

so while im wide awake , you have no trouble sleeping
cause when a heart breaks , no it don’t break even

<3LADYMELINDAAA;