fuck you ;

im happy , not extra-ordinary happy , but just happy , well no , today im not smiling like a retart & being nice to everybody , but im in a good mood . therefore the title of this blog is irrelevent , however , because my mum is asian and therefore that makes her cheap , by this time of the month i am dead set capped - which means i wait atleast an hour for a page to load which makes it horrible for me to reply to messages on bebo , yes , horrible & nearly impossible . nearly . but im bothered and also very bored so i shall wait . what a no life-er , you must be saying .

and yes maybe i have no life whats that to you ?

atleast i dont have a dick on my nose and peas for my eyes .

( sorry if you think i am describing you , but honestly with that description i could be talking about half of my school )

so today is monday , week B , wtf my keyboard is lagging , no no it isnt (:

anyway first period was technology , technology could be the reason why i suicide , dont get me wrong , tech is a B L U D G E but even bludges could be fun , for example french . HAH ! french .

anyway , for technology were making letter boxes , graces quote ' to put all the sefton letters that they send us in ' our school has a letter for pretty much everything , what a tree killing , paper wasting school . maybe they should save all that printing & paper money for a better canteen maybe then can afford workers so that there smarty pants students dont wait half an hour queing up and instead they can be copying homework for there next period OR ' studying ' in the libary .

no obviously the school does not think as intelligently as me .

i hope a SRC is reading this , cough * evelina , so maybe on behalf of the student body they can tell the stupid fat cow & the skinny whore that the students are suffering from the lack of assitance in the canteen . anyway , i think i was talking about technolgy , yes thats right , technology ; so today my two sides for the letter box was uneven , so the very kind grace fixed it for me , THAAANK YOU GRACIE LEE ! ;D

then jenny that little bitch was full bitching about the , red spotted pumpkin headed, ugly fringed girl that seems to keep looking at me , maybe because shes ubber jealous that shes a quadtriple A & im a perfect B . yes , your jealous , hot boyfriend losing whore .

lets just face it , most of you will know who im talking about .

yes . its is her .

then it was recess - wasnt that bad actually , well i cant remember much of recess , its kind of like a blur , ZOMG . duncans haircut ! *drools *

i proudly pro-nounce duncan being the hottest asian guy in our grade , ( sorry judy ! , his hair can burn yours any day )

omfg - brb my brother fell asleep on the dinner table == '

ngaw his soo adorable with that little dribble coming out from his mouth , nawwwh makes me wanna bite him (8

rightiooo ; then we had history . how gay vivian dogged us normals for the brainys , oh i dont remember much abut history ethier , least nothing funny , oh i was teaching blow job lessons in history using judys pencil case, if you would like a free trial call me on 96446622 , no dont call that number its kellys . LOLL //

then we had french , & miss soljic said if i got a pericing on my tongue id look cheap . shes called me cheap , well i havent gotton one yet but once i do , without her saying so ,i'll know shes calling me cheap & god knows whatelse in her head ,

i like rubbing raymonds leg , i wonder if he likes it .

mmmm...

then it was lunch . oh yay lunch . i ate dianne's hot dog because im fat & poor .

i shall pay you back when i get money ! :L

yeah so im suppose to be on this french diet , but its just not working for me .

& long seems to enjoy my sexual healing ,

ohhh that kid has rock hard abs ,

maybe long has a long one . dry .

oh well ,

english , we had to edit stories and i editted jennys & kevins ,

kevins one is sooo cute , got me saying ' awwwww ' in the middle of nowhere how embarrassing

english shits are due on wedsday . ew .

so there my gay ass day - no finished just yet (:

then i walked home with kelly & anthony

then it was me & samantha .

yayyy then shopping (8

there was the most HOTTEST guy working at ronnis , zomg , soo yummm .

id fuck him right there .

how embarrassing i had to ask him where the wands were in ronnis ,

he was like ; ' are you dressing up ' ?

and im like ' yeah' =='

then i had a milkshake went home -

did science homework , then kelly & samantha called

then ralph called .

yayyyy rambooo's baccck ! (H)

mfly <3

i know it seems hard , but remember one thing ;


through every dark night , theres a bright day after that ,


so no matter how hard it gets stick your chest out ;


keep your head high & smile -





ngaw , i feel so lonely now , bye bye ralph & david & deejay ! have fun in snowy so last night me & judy were watching footy , and now she owes me $10 . HA ! stupid whore (:


i was on the phone with david till like forever , forever being 3am . LOL . sorry if i kept you up with me nonsense talk .


p.s / david is gay :)





so today , i woke up at 11ish & fed those fat boys that i call my brother then i showered , bought easyway & then tutor . ruby dogged tutor , lucky betch . we have like 6pages of hw this week, i should have jiggd )';





then i went home & called the very gay kelly lu , who dogged me for her cheap chinese food .


then i decided to eat too , so i made egg


and while i leaned over for the spoon to mis my egg


i got the yolk in my hair )x


so now i refuse to leave my house for mercees; drink up cause i smell like egg .


eww .


& because my mum is being a biatch and wont let me out cause i called her a dog last night .


i swear to G O D i hate her .


zomg , she made me lock the door now i dont remember what i was going to type , omfg why cant she lock the door herself .


argh .


the egg wasnt even worth making . taste like chicken .


now im going to wait outside for andy ...

notes ;
happy2months-david&gf .
amy- i'll have your back (L)








mfly x

29AUG09.

Saturday. I'm so bored.
I just came back from tutor and ate xD.
This morning i woke up really early cos i couldn't go back to sleep. I woke up at like 8:30 (:. And then i watched abit of tv and then i did my tutor homework on my bed. Yes, my bed, Melinda :).
So, yeaaah. Oh, yeah i wanted to say happy bday to Long from yesterday , HAPPY BDAY (^). So Jenny just asked me to go swimming, i really cbf right now, i wanna go watch tv =D

kellyloser.

foreveeer ;

our hearts are drunk with a beauty our eyes could never see ;

last night jenny called me while i was brushing my teeth , and i was sooo kind i even stayed on the phone with her , while she told me about her peter no dick's motor bike. etc etc . then we were talking about milkshakes & how many wonderful flavours they come in (;
ahaha , top deck . just guess readers (:


today i woke up all tired - i had one of those 5 minute sleeps where you feel as if you've only slept for like 5 minutes . self explainatory . then instead of coffee i decided to have soy milk . healthy ?.better be !. well because of that i was full pmsing on the way to school. first period was science . ahaha , jenny just full makes my day , god i love her . stupid girl got excited everytime there was a noise cause she really wanted her daffodils too bad they turned out so crappy . i kept singing& touching jenny but she full rejected me , apprantly shes ' straight ' . and i full owned kelly in science thingo , 5 & a half . suck that . then we had history , what a waste of time , all i did was rub raymond & kezz's leg hoping for a erection . evelina gave judy a pretty daffodil cause she felt sorry for judy . LOLL. then in history judy was cutting it up in pieces and was like ' OMG I HAVE FLOWER SPERM ON MY HAND ' what a whore :L. then on the way to maths, i stacked it down the stairs ,ahaha. fking maths room is so hot so i fell asleep and ended up with ink on my forehead . emabarrassing ? . YES SIR !. we have common test coming up . ohhh how scary . TT"


then lunch time . i ate soo much . what did i eat ? GELATO ! YAYYY ;D


then music , that little shop of horrors is so dirty . ' FEED ME FEED ME ALL NIGHT '


ROFLMAOOO. :L


then there was like a cricket and calvin put it on jenny & she full shitted herself . whatta noob .


then we walked home . & gracie lee is just as slutty as judy but a tad bit less only cause she covered her knee with a bandage , shes trying to hide her fleash lads ;)


ahaha then i told jenny to push me onto bitch #2 from previous blog , but jenny pushed me onto the wrong girl . stupid fucking year 7's . all whores , exception of jenny & samantha .


then me & jenny were taking luvohs on the way home . how fail . my camera was full screwed up . i need a new one , would anyone like to donate to me ?


then i went home , i clean sooo much i think i should get paid , i washed the dishes, cook rice , sweep floor , mop floor, shower the fattys and fed the dog . there im a slave . its child labour . now im struggling to get through tutor hw . hmph . yayyy weekends ;D


must watch bruno tonight . hahaha . TN this week , its a must, skipped it for like 2weeks already i miss those girlies (: . god will punish me . thankyou to the encouragment from gracie (:


note; HAPPY BIRTHDAY LONG & KIM ! (L)

mfly.

OHBITCH;

there will always be that one first love ;

that little thing called young love .

first period was french ; we had some gay ass teacher at first who made me take out my diary to check the date .

second periods was technology & cause jenny dogged me for tony i decided to talk to gracie lee & crystal .

thrid period was sports ; considering the position i had to put up with , it wasnt that bad .

kevin ; GOOD TRY GOOD TRY -

volley ball - epic fail .

fourth period was geography were judy the biatch dogged kerrie .

anywho ;

today i had a encounter with two bitches ;
both bitches identities will not be shown in this text or any text whatsoever ;

this is for your own good .

thank me you fucking whores .

bitch number 1 -

your the bitch number one today just ' because' there is no reason why i should be pissed off at you as you have not done anything to me ; but you made the kid who sits next to me in every period smell like soy sauce therefore , without a acceotable apology , i garuntee you , you will get hurt ; and so will your fucking face .

bitch number 2 -

you , fucking ruined my great last period so i'd watch my fucking back if i were you . fucking tiny eyes son of a bitch .

& jenny babes hope your gets well soon (L)

note; i hope nothing here is offensive :)

anyways then i had tutor , went for sushi with joanne , fcuking $20 on sushie ;L

& my lord vy puhlease restrain yourself from my chair (;

27AUGUST2009

SOWHAT.

the skys your limit .


what a boring day ; everyone got excited for nothing , well i did .
" OMG OMG ANDYS GONNA GET HIT . YAYYYY"
but no . geez . get my hopes up for nothing .
then my dad took his time to leave the house so i lagged going to GJ,
sorry for making you guys wait !
then we went for a smoke . which i know is horrible ,
but but ...
yeah yeah
then train . TRALALALA.
mercee stacked it down the stairs ;)
god i wish i had mercee , grace & samanthas face .- so pretty )x

LOVELOVELOVE;MFLY.

whatever it is .

why i must say you are truely beautiful :)

Why hello !

Today went pretty quick , all I can remember is science , maybe cause it was the last period of the day . we did some atom thing and some other thing but I didn’t know how to do it so jenny helped me (: & Kelly . ahaha . ILOVEYOUBOTH!. Ahha then we went woollies to buy marshmallows , omfg that reminds me I owe jenny $2 & Edward $4 . then I got some mousse thingo & nail polish J . \yaaay . & then I saw kimmie , my lord shes so pretty . roflmaooo anday had smoke and then he couldn’t walk .ROFLMAAAAO. then we went on the train back to sefton and some asian guy called me crazy . he was like ( in viet ) sorry for the shit translation ; ‘ omg , all day at school and now im on the train with a crazy women’ god I was fully cut . then then to make it worse Kelly dogged me for her husband . hmph . so then I fattened myself up with a mars bar . LOLLL . went to andys place and I got him pissed by making stories up with his dog and how it died . kinda sad actually /= . then I woke up david . I hope he isn’t angry J . them omfggg . that kid whats his name tryd to kill me with the ball . then Nicholas came over ! ;D
Ahaha & me & Kelly were epic fail at bball . sighs * . lalalla then went home and had like noodles with those little eggs , what are they called ? well I like difficulty tryna stab it onto the fork so I ended up using two forks . geniues ;D
& now im fuckloads bored . wheres Ralph ? D;

mfly x

note ; photo was taken on hume highway at approx. 5;15am effects were used .

<3

yeszhuur ;

last night i had the most horrible sleep ever ,
but then beautiful bena called me & made me fall asleep,
he called it ... insomnia ?
:L

today we picked gala day teams , & well yeah wasnt as bad as i thought ; i had office messenger thingo with long , evie & vietson , it was so gaaay !
long was tellin us some ghost story that was lame , and involved some form of prostituition and i didnt get it /=
& like some skyscraper story . LOLLL . & longs mummy is dangerous (x
" HOPSCOTCH ?! HUH ? WHATS HOPSCOTCH !?"
agrooooo :L
& then we played pictionary , was soooo gay !
fricking vietson drew my mum as a sheep . my lord .
and evie is a fail when it comes to drawing lions .
andys pissed off with me cause i hung up on him tomorow , faggot .
i think im going over andys tomorow ,
so now im on the phone with jenny , and she too is googling how to do three way . fail .

god help me ;

its exactly 1;31 am and i cant go to sleep unless the stupid mother fricking virus thing finishes downloading , 50 more minutes ... omfg /
i owe david like $10 because i hung up on him , bloody oath im as pov. as it is .
tick tick tick
i hope blogging passes the time ... im trying to press the keys on the keyboard lightly so that my parents will not tell me off , geez god thanks for giving me such fat fingers .
im going to start uploading photos as well as my blogs , i like my photography even with my shit camera , god i wish i could atleast lay down my back is killing me
but i cant , you see i made a pledge to stay awake for 40hours for 40 hour famine , i hope those indian children appreciate what im going through for them , bloody went through 4 cappucinos today , i would so webcam with someone but i cant-
why ?
because nobodys talking to me besides judy .
how sad .
i think is i press really hard on the keys it makes less noise ,
oh wth my dog is barking , what is it barking at ?
holy shit i never fed it .
wait i hear another dog barking - i think i should i write a short story on this
how my poor baby dog misses her mother and so she barks every night mourning for the loss of her mother and then one night while shes barking to herself another dog barks back and its her mother and then there reunited .
wow , its even coming true - can you hear my dog barking and then the other ...
no no its just my dog barking to itself , what a retarted dog .
anyway im hungry wtf .
what did i have for dinner ?
curry . LOL.
i dont have indian friends , none at all
there arnt many round cheso ,
omfg even jusy has stopped talking to me ,
im so lonely , im mrs lonely ,
oh mark gets me all worried i hope his in his cosy bed now.
he should stay up too late in the ct all those hobos are everywhere , whoa geez its been like 10minutes and ive typed this much , looks like judys dogged me at 1;42 am judy dogged me
yayyyy atleast linda is talking to me (:
i dont feel so lonely now
yay download complete

phone calls ;

those little memories <3

my 12 hour phone battery died because of losers who couldnt stop calling me .

so like with my intelligent brain well , actually kellys , but in a matter of factly evie's i learnt to 3way .cause like evie was such a retart & actually googled ' how to three-way' she has no life that girl , so like today was my typical saturday . wake up at 10 , wash dishes ( i know ! im so good ! ), coffee , shower , dress up , easy way , tutor , pancakes , curry and then strawberrys, THEEEEEN . phone phone phone!; ahahha my mum was full nagging , i feel sorry for them having to put up with me , ohhhhh nokia n97 is on a 49 cap . ! BRAVOOOOO (x

so like kelly told me upload pictures along with blogs but i cbf . too stressful ;L

soooo update on melindas cooking adventures, today i burnt i pie , all because of kelly i forgot i had a pie in the oven & i only realised with my brother told me he smelt something funny . good little creatures arnt they /? (:

im doing 40hour famine ;D

no sleep - chyeaaaah (x

im going to die , im like on my 4th coffee . watch my break out by monday .

im feelin' supaaaa (8

andy says i sound like a northy whata fag . south <3

21AUGUST2009

happy birthday lucy <3

So, today was pretty gay. I mean, i got freaking gum on my skirt when i was in maths, like what the fuck. Man, it was like fully gross D:. Stupid people, why the hell do you have to stuck your gum on the chair for. geeeez. Yeah, anyways lol first period was P.E which was okay. Jenny loves my red pen, it's like the best yeah (:. And then it was music which was pretty boring cos like Judy was office msngr, yeah judy, it was boring without you okay, whatever ahaha. I got to play the bass guitar which was pretty easy and then we had maths and i actually learnt something today, omg, Without Judy, of course :D. Then this was the part i got shit on my skirt LOL:/.

Then it was lunch and i never new that it was the last day to give in the daffodils and i only had 3bucks and that was like my luch money so i didn't eat luch ahah. Then we went bball courts to talk about gala days with the guys. Omg, theres supposed to be 5 girls and 5 guys right, but we have 6 girls, and i really don't know what to do. Either we split into three or just stay with them which will leave mel alone, and that's kinda slack, so idk.. hmm.

So, then we had science. Najie like caught a fly with his sharpener and full was like to miss, I'll sell it for you for $2.50, LOL. Anyways, then went home and went to tutor and he forgot about the hw which was so cool cos i didn't do it :D. Okay, then i went home and my mum was like Judy called you like 3 times and melinda as well. So, i call Judy and Mel yeah, we chatted about stuff (:.

kellyloser

all you need -

cause all you need baby is a little mc'lovin (;

today was fucking . argh .
so imma skip the shits in between ;
i was on the phone for like a gazillion hours, tryna sort out everything today which was a complete waste of time -
& while im talking about phones , let me add how much i love ralph, judy & kelly (:
i think we may be forever (L)
my gosh , i swear judy is so gay & so is evelina , zomg .
4 ways - epic fail .
evie spent like a year just trying to find the hold button .
ahaha , ROFLMAO. najie was trying to catch flies in science . and he caught one and told the teacher he'd sell it to her for $2.50 .
LOLLL. me & andy were playing knoughts & crosses on our arms .
so gay . T.T
and cause im craaaazy ass capped , i cant apologize to bena for being such a biatch last night -
im sorry love , lets hope you read this ?(:
i saw my beautiful alycieee & seamus today , like zomfgg , i went crazy ! like OMFG. spastic .;L
thank you vy for spotting me on the street , if it werent for you i dont think alyce would have seen me ;D
why i must say seamus has grown . his like taller then me . shizzle ' .
i finished four pages of tutor hw in like , 1 hour . YAYYYY.
ben would you like to pick me up from tutor ?
becase id very much like it if you did .
my mum is such a biaaaatch right now , full telling me off for nothing .
bitch feast .
argh .
i hate fb but i have to use it because evryone else uses it .
so i dont wanna feel left out
its taking a zillion yonks for this stupid virus thing to update itself .
my lord
& happy birthday lucy !
why dont you homo;s watch this ;http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TOfyeMrm5Sg
its better then judys dedi from her boyfriend (x

mfly <3

19AUGUST09

Heeeyy (:

Wow, mel's been blogging a lot lately lol. Like, about a month ago i was like blogging and she was like, "omg, you don't have a life, who the hell blogs anymore" .. or something:P.

Yeah, anyways, i'm back (:. Havent blogged for ages ahah :P. Miss me :P. So, today was an okay day, i guess. First period we had French which was kinda-ish boring cos like i don't understand a word shes saying /:. Yeah, and then we had P.e and we had a sub, Ms soljic which was cool and i kept telling Belynda that i hate her and she was an asshole and she full got sad, but i was joking ofcourse (:, she's sp freaking cute, though ahahah. Then, we had music which was like fucking funny as ahaha. I drew on Judy's face and it already came off yeah. But me, Jenny & emily were full like shit, it's still there, and your full smudging it and shit, shes so gullible lmfao. And she was full like rubbing it and going "Oh shit, i'm going woolworths later, omfg, what am i going to do?" Me, J & e were full cracking up ahah. So last period was um, English. Shiz, that was boring, it was rfp and like it was reading for like 60 minutes.

And then after school when i just like came home, kinda. Jenny called me and was like wanna come swimming and i was like nah, don't think my mum wll let but i asked anyway and she was like yeahhh, you need excersise lol. So swimming was alritee. It was so cold, though. Me, Jenny and Judy were full trying to sit on each other but it was like epic fail man D:

- Loving things like you has left me bruised, black and blue. Loving things like you has made me so confused. And I can't figure out what I've been waiting on, God I can't be living life for things I know are wrong.

kellyloser.

tomorow ;

today was gay .
im tired .
fuck ben calls really late .
are you reading this ben ?
but its not your fault of course .
i love you .

i need help with science . omfg .
jennys got the shittys , hope she takes some panadol
bet gracie lees groupie never has little fits .
that little perfect group ;
while im here
id like to thank , evelina & belynda for the cupcka tray & container (:
you girlies are wonderful
& when im not lazy i will give you back your tray & wash your container
<3

today .

in twenty years you wont remember where you spent your nights or what you did ; but you will remember the friends you spent them with

today was absolutely beautiful ;
period 1 - maths ; LOL . miss made us promise ourselves we would do our homework & not cheat , followed by a one minutes moment of silence . during this gay ass one minute miss was like ;
miss - michael your not promising youself
michael - miss i am !
miss - no michael your drawing . promise yourself ! .
ROFLMAOO.
period 2 -french ; kelly should like learn to keep secrets & so should judy , they both have big fat mouths , thank god for me (:
period 3 - english - the subbie was a complete biartch' so like she moved alec next to me so lucy moved next to raymond and jenny dogged me for lezzo jezzo so , i moved next to kevin so i can talk to antonio :L so we were writing short stories & anthonys one was beyond gay .

"so then somehthing hit kevin in the head and he thought it was his guardian angel but it wasnt it was a man with muscles ."

yeah i think anthonys a freak too . hi5 !

period 4- mr ac-- was alright . i have like eye problems , cant even copy the right shiets down /

HOMETIME- so then kelly , kerrie , judy , anthony , andy & i walked jenny home , then we went woolies and spent like 20 billion years trying to choose the right things , theeeeen the cupcake holders were like 20bucks and we were like .WTFFFFF.
so we didnt even bother in the end , then we couldnt buy food dye cause you have to be over 18 which is knda gay , anywayyy then theree was like the hottest guy alive at cheso like OMFGGG. id give him my first anyday . arghh *drools *
yeah then we bought ice cream
and after the losers came back to mine , we made the shiets & anthony was a fantastic rubbish man ;D
the cake turned out pretty ish .
im sorry there are like only 10 /=
so its only our group & andy + anthony .
sorry lads !
ahaha , then when they all left me & kelyl shared a bowl of pho .
how asian (8
then i 3wayed with david & ralph .
for 167 minutes ., LOLLLL.
kelly was meant to do some dare but shes such a stupid girl .
kelly was suppse to say ; HI MY NAME IS KELLY LU AND IM CALLING FROM THE SEFTON PLAY HOUSE , YOU HAVE WON ME FOR ONE YEAR .
but shes a fail , so as an example i called david - randomly of course
and demonstrated but he was like ; MELINDA ?
and im like ; fuck .== '

but but i love you ralph & david very much !
even though you said the c word ///

MFLY.

new start ;;

all the building up & knocking down of walls throughout those years has fully prepared me for this .
i'll be alright , with a little bit of time & chocalates , im pretty damn sure i'll be just fine ;
so heres it to young love -
the ups & downs
thrills & spills
the long chase & final catch
from the hugs to the most awaited kisses .
to the very last goodbye ,
heres to the pain , the laugh & the memories .
id do it all over again ,
a million times over .
just for the fun of it .

im gonna stop with all this , umm... personal life shits . jenny says its boring the fuck out of her & she hears enough of it at school , she dosent need to read about it too -
so my day - it was quite great actually , today was just one of those days when you wake up and you know you'll have a great day . the weather was fabalicious , i love it how spring is finally coming round' again winter has been driving me nuts - completly , i love how its sunny and still abit windy so its not hot .
in the morning me & jenny did raymonds hair .
he looked so gangduh.
first period was a bludge , jenny , grace & i just talked about jennys rich fame & housing when she becomes a achie -- something . and i dont think gracie will be anything she might like to be a nun - and something about grace has god on her side and i have like - buddha .
second period- history was boring so i put like purple dots on andys head , he didnt like it so he rubbed them off . mr murray talks alot .
period three - im about to start running out of things to talk about , i cant remember what we did in what periods , judy thinks my pimples dissappear in the sun . i think shes stupid .
fuck this i dont like typing about my day who the fuck wants to read about someone elses day unless its intresting , and lets face it . my day is boring .
i was meant to go swimming but jenny dogged - by saying that , im lying cause she didnt actallu dog it , it was her mum , its not jennys fault her mum decided to be a dog for a day . im sorry jenny if this offends you - i'll take it all back if you want me to . shit reminds me im suppose to call kerrie - fuck now jennys pissed . im so forgetful . dammit . facebook & bebo are gay . no one talks to me . i have no social life . ciao mfly x

great .

i hate rejection .

mfly .

we cannot force anyone to love us -
all we can do is be someone who can be loved .

i refuse to think i am lovable - or even a inch close to the meaning . its not just that i dont know the meaning of the word but its such a difficult ' thing ' to grasp .
little girls going around with there boyfriends saying they love eachother and last a couple of months , thats what love is suppose to mean to them . others go chasing it all of there lives and a few months - weeks even is the closest they'll ever get to it .
i doubt i'd be able to catch love . i love the chase . but the result - the consequnce . im just not into that shit .
i can list a trillion things why im not lovable , a billion things why i cant be loved . and another million things why im not loved . but i have a life , or somewhat close to one where i believe i do .
i hope one day , id find someone whose just as unlovable as me -
maybe the negative & negative will possibly become a possitive . <3

MFLY.

this isnt fair .

if i wanted more complications in my life id give you a ring '
but last time i checked i didnt call you -

i dont like this .
i dont like it one single bit .
i hate that i like you ,
in fact i hate that i love you
i hate that this started at all
i hate that i was the one who called .
i hate that im so dependant on someone else to make me entirely happy
or that i need someone else to complete me .
i hate that im so alone ,
i hate that i have no one to tell how im feeling to ,
and even if i did
i dont think the words would come out right ,
i hate that nothing seems in place
and i hate the feeling that is beginning to grow ,
i hate that im so emotional
i hate you ,
i hate you for making me feel this way
i hate you for making me feel as if i need you
that i need you to sleep,
that maybe it wont be okay without you .
i hate that i know the fatcs of life -
what happens with young love -
it all fades away .
it fcuks you up real bad .
i hate knowing i love you .
and i hate knowing the risks ,
i hate that im afraid
& im sorry ,
but i hate that im gonna close the door now ,
so you;d be on the other side
somewhere away from me
a place where i wont be able to come to you-
or let you come to me .
that way i wont need you - as much
that way i can maybe sleep without hearing your voice last .
i dont want to -
but i have to .

- mfly.

ohmgosh ; please dont think im corny , theres a certain line that i dare not cross when it comes to the whole emotional shit . been past it once , maybe even twice , but noo waaay a third time .
fuck why dosent kelly blog ?
it cant be a kelly&melly blog if only melly blogs . that capped son of a bitch . always blah blah blah . capped . argh .
so today i saw raymond with his gangsta haircut . whoaaa whaata gangsta , ten bucks ann will like him even more now .
i like the way ruby does my hair , she is quite a darling , that girl .
-
&& i think im loosing it - cant seem to make the words come out right .
yeah yeah baby you've got me tossin' & turnin '
makin me - makin me want your lovin ' .

supaaaadupaaaspeeerm(:

im soo frickaaaa lickinggg happy , you know the happy happy happy ?
yeaaah well for some unknown reason im fricking happy (:

so todaaaay ;
i went to jennys & spent like 10minutes trying to tie the knots on the scoobies for her little sister & when i failed - epically . i watched a tuturial on youtube . but that was a compleeeete waste of time , cause the stupid homo who had fat fingers was stupid . yes stupid . laaaaah .
i think anthonys reading this , case id really like to tell him that im not a dog & i belive that his is completely head over heels in lurrrrve with jenny (:
omfg . gang raped today . by those leboos '
&heres anthony ,
anthony - i saw that guy try to rape you & i was thinking , should i do something ? but then i was like naaaah , dont wanna get my hands dirty .
faggot if im pregnant , imma tell your mumma your the dad.

i feeeel happy :)
i ate some chicken thing my daddy made it tasted nice (8
frickinggggg . ahahahahha . KUNG FU PANDA (x

yesterday , today & tomorow .

anthonys a faggot who thinks im a faggot but really im not a faggot so i dont think he is ethier .

i have massive pimple on the left side of my face its kinda up , abit to the right . well its massive and with massive , i mean massive , no exagerrating . its like humungaaaas .
its like bloody jupiter ; all the fricking pimples in my whole lifetime , ganged up on me .
bloody puberty . YEAH YEAH FUCK YOU ! .
argh . rage .

ever had one of those days when your completely useless & ugly ?
or atleast you feel like it ?
yeah , i had one of those ' ugly ' days .
my body is not in porpotion and then to top that off , i have a fucking planet on my face .

& if things werent horrible enough , the shit just keeps rolling in .
im having such a shit week .
why ?
is it because i stopped believing in god ?
well its not my fault .
bloody oath ,
im sorry if this offends grace or michael .
its just well i cant be expected to believe in someone who ive never met before , i cant devote my whole life , to pretend theres something , someone out there .
sorry religons just not working for me .
& to omaar who so desperatley persuaded me to believing in a god , cause then atleast im living for something -
im very sorry i wasted so much of your time on me .
truth is , im not much of a believer , a follower or a devoted person .

i want a rabbit (:

m.

im feeling happy ;
the happy you feel when someone gives you a bunch of flowers and reminds you how much they love you , thats the happy i feel , but i didnt get any flowers or even a reminder that someone loves me , no .
i had the shittest most horrible day of my life , and no one gives a fuck .
yet i feel happy .
really happy .
i cant stop smiling , i thought i was retarted , just smiling like a lunatic .
but no .
im not retarted and im not a lunatic .
and even though i have a tummy ache and i feel ekky and even though my feet is extremely cold and no one seems to care i still manange to be happy and smile - and it isnt even the plastic smile that sales assitance give you .

no im smiling and im happy .
because well , guess its because i think im moved on .


goodbye . m