this isnt fair .

if i wanted more complications in my life id give you a ring '
but last time i checked i didnt call you -

i dont like this .
i dont like it one single bit .
i hate that i like you ,
in fact i hate that i love you
i hate that this started at all
i hate that i was the one who called .
i hate that im so dependant on someone else to make me entirely happy
or that i need someone else to complete me .
i hate that im so alone ,
i hate that i have no one to tell how im feeling to ,
and even if i did
i dont think the words would come out right ,
i hate that nothing seems in place
and i hate the feeling that is beginning to grow ,
i hate that im so emotional
i hate you ,
i hate you for making me feel this way
i hate you for making me feel as if i need you
that i need you to sleep,
that maybe it wont be okay without you .
i hate that i know the fatcs of life -
what happens with young love -
it all fades away .
it fcuks you up real bad .
i hate knowing i love you .
and i hate knowing the risks ,
i hate that im afraid
& im sorry ,
but i hate that im gonna close the door now ,
so you;d be on the other side
somewhere away from me
a place where i wont be able to come to you-
or let you come to me .
that way i wont need you - as much
that way i can maybe sleep without hearing your voice last .
i dont want to -
but i have to .

- mfly.

ohmgosh ; please dont think im corny , theres a certain line that i dare not cross when it comes to the whole emotional shit . been past it once , maybe even twice , but noo waaay a third time .
fuck why dosent kelly blog ?
it cant be a kelly&melly blog if only melly blogs . that capped son of a bitch . always blah blah blah . capped . argh .
so today i saw raymond with his gangsta haircut . whoaaa whaata gangsta , ten bucks ann will like him even more now .
i like the way ruby does my hair , she is quite a darling , that girl .
-
&& i think im loosing it - cant seem to make the words come out right .
yeah yeah baby you've got me tossin' & turnin '
makin me - makin me want your lovin ' .